today i dont feel well. and technically speaking, i didn't feel well yesterday. i was worrying a bit about one dilemma, a personal dilemma, the possible dismissal of one of my roles, when bam! a whole new huge different thing was thrown on me. at least it made me forget about the other thing for an hour

today i tried to find people to hang around with, talk to, be normal (myself but comfortable) with. this plan failed. everyone is boring, broken , or caught in static. and then there are the people whom i didnt even try to contact. sometimes i just dont have the heart to even bother.

the thoughts in my brain keep chasing me in circles. i am both misunderstood and misunderstanding. i lost my job on tuesday: permanent layoffs, not enough work to keep us around. i need a new job.

i want to see my friends

(my mood is not attraction, but my connection is noodled, i'll have to edit later)